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Route 7

Love Maps

15-minute inner-world update map

You’re reading this on your own. Nothing here needs a partner, a room, or an account. Take your time. When it feels right, you can do it together live.

Update knowledge of each other's current world: stresses, dreams, worries, friends, preferences, soothing.

Best for

You want to update each other's inner world.

Skip it when

You are using questions as a test.

What it looks like

The fifteen minutes, step by step

One person speaks, the other listens. You swap as the route guides you.

00:00-01:00

Whoever’s speaking: Choose category and ask permission.

Whoever’s listening: Agree or choose a gentler category.

You’ll know the step landed when: Category set.

01:00-04:00

Whoever’s speaking: Ask 2-3 questions from the category.

Whoever’s listening: Answer with current details: facts + feelings + changes.

You’ll know the step landed when: Partner B map updated.

04:00-05:30

Whoever’s speaking: Summarize two details learned.

Whoever’s listening: Correct or add detail.

You’ll know the step landed when: Summary accepted.

05:30-08:30

Whoever’s speaking: Answer while partner asks 2-3 questions.

Whoever’s listening: Ask questions and listen.

You’ll know the step landed when: Partner A map updated.

08:30-10:00

Whoever’s speaking: Correct or add detail.

Whoever’s listening: Summarize two details learned.

You’ll know the step landed when: Second summary accepted.

10:00-13:00

Whoever’s speaking: Each asks one future-oriented question: dream, worry, support, or change.

Whoever’s listening: Each answers at chosen depth.

You’ll know the step landed when: Future detail added.

13:00-15:00

Whoever’s speaking: Each says one thing to remember and one appreciation.

Whoever’s listening: Each says one thing to remember and one appreciation.

You’ll know the step landed when: Map note captured.

Exact words you can borrow (6)

Current stress
“What is stressing you most right now?”

Dream
“What is one dream or goal that is alive for you lately?”

Soothing
“What is one of your favorite ways to be soothed right now?”

Daily detail
“What did you do today or yesterday that mattered to you?”

Summary
“I want to remember that ____ is important to you right now.”

Appreciation
“Thank you for letting me know your world better.”

Fill-in-the-blank sentences (1)

Remember builder: I want to remember that ____ is important to you right now.

You’ll know you did it when…
  • Each partner answered 2-3 Love Map questions.
  • Each partner summarized two details learned.
  • At least one current stress, dream, worry, preference, or support need was updated.
  • No one was shamed for missing information.
  • Each partner named one thing to remember.
Sourced: S9

Practice, not therapy. See Privacy and Sources.

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